Thursday 30 September 2010

London

Well I spent the day in London yesterday - normal stuff, man about a dog etc - and what a day it was! An early start on British rail saw the first of the day's problems, no power. For £60 I expected at least a plug socket for the faithful old 'lappy', but no, I was told, snappily "There are some in first class", to which I replied, with as much sarcasm as was possible at that time, "Great well I'll just give you another £60 and pop in there shall".
After the long and powerless journey I arrived, saw the man about the dog, and then hopped back on a train to catch my ongoing train. This is when disaster struck. I was either given the classic 'Artful Dodger' move, or I dropped my wallet, but either way, as the train moved off and I walked through the station I realised it had gone. I quickly ran back up to the platform to get someones attention but no one was there, I then ran back downstairs to inform the staff at the ticket desk. The first woman I spoke to told me to go back up to the platform and tell someone, I told her that I had done that, she then tutted and asked me what train it was. I told her the exact train, time, and direction that it was going in. I also explained that it contained all my cards, money, and train tickets. She then made a phone call, begrudgingly, and waved me aside saying "Wait there then.....Next".
I waited, whilst panicking and cancelling all of my cards in the process. After around ten minutes I headed back to the window to be told "No it wasn't there, you will have to get another ticket". With this she pulled the blind down! I banged on the window saying "Is that it then, I'm in the middle of London, I have no money, no cards, and I actually bought a return ticket of which will be on record, and your just saying Buy another ticket....How"?. Her answer, "Get someone to buy you one". As she uttered those words she again pulled the blind down, smiling this time, and saying "Ok, yes you will have to buy another ticket, thanks then"
At this point I was on the verge of battering through the office, but as it was I thought that doing that would end in arrest, so I chose just to wander around aimlessly for five minutes to calm down and think.

TO BE CONTINUED................

9.50 p.m Just got back and had my tea, so here goes...

After a few minutes of thought I returned to the ticket office to ask if there was anything that could be done. It was a different lady the second time (who had obviously heard the previous conversation ) and she couldn't wait for me to ask, answering with an inevitable no. She did however have time to spit out one of the nut shells that she was tucking into, spitting it out in the process, before she uttered the words "Get someone else to buy you a ticket over the phone, it will be £55plus the admin".
I decided that I would rather eat my own shoe than pay that again, so I headed for the tube to get to London Victoria and National Express bus. I didn't have enough money, and asking anyone in London for anything is out of the question, so i then headed for the bus stop, to get a bus to a bus.!!!
Incredibly the bus driver (top bloke) let me off the fare as I didn't have the required money. Even more incredible was the fact that I got a phone call on the bus from a lady whose little brother had found my wallet! It was too late to go and get it, and I had missed the train and paid another £30 but she said that she would send the wallet back to me. Major bonus.

An hour later the bus arrived at the bus depot. My wife had bought me a ticket 'online' for the journey back, and so after the obligatory delay, a sumptuous six hours on a coach, the constant smell of ****, no heating, and a back of death, I was back in Devon. What did I learn ?

I learnt that London with no money is an evil place to be. I learnt that staff at British Rail in London can be *******, I learnt that London bus drivers are top people, I learnt that National Express is cheap, but rubbish and a bit smelly. I learnt that I am a pratt for losing or letting my wallet be stolen, and I learnt that when you are a tramp, don't ask a bloke with a suit on, who has lost his wallet, and has no money, for a handout!!!.

P.S Great day today. I was invited to speak in front of the senior greens at P.A.F.C and we had a great laugh. Good memories, a bit of banter, and a cup of tea.

Love is strong.

CH

Tuesday 28 September 2010

Removal

Apologies about the previous video being deleted. It showed a goalkeeper throwing his top off and running from the pitch after he had made a bit of a blunder in a game. It was very funny and full marks to the keeper for sticking to his guns, but after looking at the clip again I think there was a link on the site to all sorts of weird and wonderful Internet 'stuff'. Better to be safe than sorry!

P.S Early start, bed time now.
P.P.S Leeds 4 Preston 6. What's that all about!

CH

Monday 27 September 2010

PT away

A bit of fresh air, a lot of sweat, a good chat, and we are away. The PT sessions have started, and I have thoroughly enjoyed them. It makes a change to be on the other side of the fence - although in saying that I couldn't help but join in, after all don't they say to lead by example. Hope I didn't inflict too much pain!

Football wise and a few things have cropped up that are tempting me. I know that sometimes in life you have to play a waiting game, but it isn't half frustrating, waiting. Anyway back to reality, and shoes need to be bought, school projects need finishing off, and dinner needs creating.

CH

Sunday 26 September 2010

Overview

Since last blogging (that sounds so Yorkshire!), I have, in no particular order, taken the gang surfing, eaten lots of cake in an English country garden (thanks again Carol and Andrew!), helped with a school project, had a lovely roast lamb dinner, walked around a big reservoir, taken an engine to bits..ish so that Cam could have a burn on his bike(thanks again Carol and Andrew), bought three magnificent hot chocolate's, hoovered the car, broken my flip-flops, thrown the beach tent and wind-break away, emailed my head off (that's the children's description), text my head off (same again), and last but not least, I have watched a little bit of football.

Enjoy the rest of your weekend

Love to all

CH

Thursday 23 September 2010

Walk On

Massive congratulations to 'Sammo' at Northampton Town F.C. What a night that must have been, to beat Liverpool is one thing, but to beat them on penalties and at Anfield is just incredible. For the four or five thousand 'Cobbler's' fans who made the trip up to Merseyside, it will have been just about worth it!!.

Sorry Jase, you must be fuming today!

CH

Wednesday 22 September 2010

Atmospherics?

Rude people shopping in Tesco, call centres, online delivery services, greedy people shopping in Tesco, those people who are tight and yet have money, drivers who become Superhero's in their cars, bull****ers, staff at Sports Soccer who can barely function, tradesman who do very little and yet who take the **** with the bill, and last but not least the mental price of petrol. I am of course generalising but these rants are just today's offerings from good old Brits I have come across. We do love a moan don't we! I say it could be worse, we could be living in India or Pakistan, Afghanistan or even France (that was a joke!).
It may be the fact that our summer is coming to an end, or that the cost of living is sky high, it could be the fact that we are being taxed to within an inch of our lives on a daily basis, or it could even be that the 'atmospherics' are effecting our moods, but one thing is for sure, we are a very tense nation at the moment. This nationwide mood was summed up for me this morning, two bus drivers were actually arguing with each other over who should move over! Where was the obligatory hand wave, the nod of acknowledgement of being in the 'firm', where was the flash of the lights and the blocking in of any cars so that the other bus could come out, where was Arthur and where was Olive (younger readers will not get that, I barely do!). They were all absent, and I was left watching on as two bus drivers huffed and puffed away. Come on lads, we live in Devon, let's not get wound up.
Take a leaf out of the book of the lovely old boy I came across the other day, he who reversed a mile back down a country lane to let me and my mate Nigel past. Fair enough Nigel's jeep could have eaten his little car and we would have had to reverse back around twelve miles the other way to let him through, but the kind gentleman in question just kept smiling as he weaved into, and then out of, the thorn bushes that lined both sides of the lane. He must have 'crashed' into the bushes at least fifteen times, and yet each time he would beam away and put his thumbs up at us, as if to say sorry at the time he was taking. When he had eventually reached his destination we gave him a big thumbs up and thank-you, and he was still beaming away with his thumbs up, even though his car was now scratched severely on both sides. Admittedly it would have been hilarious, if at the end of his manoeuvre, he had shouted obscenities to us and waved his fists, but he didn't and that's the point. He was taking whatever was thrown at him in his stride and just dealing with it. Now there is a lesson for us all - and it's not to make sure that when driving down a small country lane you are in a very big jeep!

P.S Footballers back in the headlines, there's a shock.

P.P.S Apologies about the amount of *'s in tonight's blog, it was a bit strong I admit, but I felt in context with the story. Anyway who gives a ****!

P.P.P.S Well done Sammo, go on you 'Cobbler's'.


CH

Tuesday 21 September 2010

Website

Tired.com!

P.S Tomorrow I blog, and I blog big.

CH

Monday 20 September 2010

Many Happy Returns

Can't stop, I'm in tax return hell!

CH

Sunday 19 September 2010

Update

Apologies on an epic scale for my enforced blog absence. I have had some major technical problems with the old 'lappy', and coupled with the loss of my iPhone(and subsequent mild depression that came with that loss) I have been rendered incapable of any 'postage' - to be fair I could have visited any one of the Internet cafes now dotted around, I could have used my wife's laptop, or I could even have used my daughters notebook, but lets not go on about it eh!.
Anyway, after a very busy week I am now sat down ready for action. First of all, well done to T.U.F.C for another good result, although I must admit I half expected the name 'Sills' to pop up on Sky Sports News. After all, isn't it the norm for ex players to score against their former clubs? Having not seen the team sheets or the report though, I don't even know if old 'Timmy' played, but I'm sure he got a good reception either way, and deservedly so.
I also saw the Sheffield Wednesday coach travelling back from Plymouth quite late on Saturday evening, always a sign that a team has spent a fair while in the changing room after a game!
At Hargreaves Towers the pace has remained frenetic. With the children back at school and my wife at work, and with me having separated most of my fingers to put in as many pies as I can, life is very busy at home.
Now the 'footy' career has finally come to an end, I am branching out in a couple of areas which is really exciting. As well as still waiting in the wings for someone else's misfortune (football jobs of course!),I am also going into the world of business. I am close to sorting out a premises for a coffee shop/eaterie which is something that I have always wanted to do. I will keep you posted on date, place, and menu!. And finally, I am soon to complete my PT training courses. I have always loved keeping fit and 'hammering' the gym, but soon I will be able to put other people through the mill as well, so be ready for Bleep tests, twenty minute 'beastings' and lots of press-ups! - other workouts can be arranged at a much more leisurely and enjoyable pace.


SIMON LOVE

Whilst watching Man United overcome Steven Gerrard's best efforts this afternoon, I helped a mate of mine, Paul Hannah, host an auction - Paul Hannah, of Glastonbury 'caining it' fame, and all round top bloke, that is.
The auction and game beforehand were for the charity MIND, and in remembrance of Simon Love, who had so tragically lost his life. Judging by the turnout, and the way people spoke about him, he was one hell of a lad. The auction and game raised well over a thousand pounds, and it will probably be nearing the fifteen hundred mark once all the counting has been done, and the beer has been drunk. The game itself was a good laugh but very, very painful. If I wake up tomorrow feeling like I did after 40 seconds today I will be reunited with a surgeon friend of mine before the the week is out. By the way Paul, you were fantastic, you had vision, determination, desire, and skill. Just don't take another penalty!
I have to say that I did feel sorry for the lads on my team, having to play with ten men isn't easy (I'll try to get fit for the re-match!).

P.S Nice one for the shirt Manse (Extra tight as expected)
P.P.S I can't quite remember the name of the lad who scored from 30 yards today!!
P.P.P.S Got to go as the girls are baking, the fire alarm has gone off, and I am worried.
P.P.P.P.S Kev, I still love you and think about you daily (I love Jenny more though)

CH

Tuesday 14 September 2010

Faultless?

The blog that never was! The blog that I somehow managed to delete by mistake on Sunday night was basically about the Ferguson's experiences over the weekend ( Alex and Darren's that is, not Sarah's). It was also about a windy lane and an old boy, but not to worry, it is time to move on. It was entirely my fault as well, the fact that my typing is improving rapidly means that, as I am furiously banging away on the keys, there is always a danger of some bizarre combination of keys reacting in such a way that the computer just cannot handle. This was the case on Sunday. I chose not to smash the laptop up, as not only would it have cost me alot of money, it would also have sent out the wrong message - I smashed the table up instead!
I will blog away later but for now, it's time to go to work.

CH

Sunday 12 September 2010

OFF

OH MY GOD!. I have just written a peach of a blog which has taken me around an hour. I HAVE DELETED IT BY MISTAKE AND AM NOW MASSIVELY AND MORBIDLY ****** OFF. I am currently suffering from the onset of turrets, am considering smashing the laptop into smithereens, and am now getting a beer. See you next week!

CH

Friday 10 September 2010

Changes

I'm going mad. I actually thought I had posted blogs in the last few days, I am obviously very wrong. I thought I had talked about Pakistan's cricket team, Harriet's bedtime stories, and a trip to see a man about a dog, but I haven't, and so I won't!
My wife has just attempted to switch on the BB final but my response was enough to persuade her to turn it off (whilst pressing the record button of course), and I am sat down after taking the children for a late night walk to the shop to buy some sweets. Very irresponsible I admit, but hell it's the weekend.
I was walking along Torquay seafront the other day and bumped in to an old mate of mine from Plainmoor. He was working on one of the day tripping boats in the harbour, and as we got chatting he told me a bit about his life, about the war, and about the bay. His stories were absolutely magnificent, from the Messhersmits trying to gun him down in the war, to the story about Vane tower overlooking the harbour, to the sea of warships lining up along the coast ready to go to war on D-Day - what a difference now, with speedboat rides, boat trips, and yatchs lining the marina instead of landing craft and battleships.
It was a quality moment with a top bloke and I just thought that I would share it with you, simple as that.
I am looking forward to all the games at the weekend, but I must admit I did get a slight pang of disapointment yesterday knowing that I would not be waiting for the bell to ring in a changing room somewhere and piling out to do battle with the lads at 3 p.m. Times are a changing though and my immediate plan is nearly complete. I will see you on the sofa on Monday but until then, have a good great weekend you beauties.

CH

Tuesday 7 September 2010

Blitz

Today marks the 70th anniversary of the Blitz. It is incredible to think that our capital alone was bombarded for 76 consecutive nights and that a million homes were destroyed in the process. To look at London now you would never know it, and yet if you take a look at some of the other cities that suffered heavy bombing during the war, namely Plymouth and Exeter, the damage can still be seen today. Plymouth was battered to a point where it almost had to be totally rebuilt (badly in alot of cases) and in Exeter it was miraculous that the cathedral survived. Sorry I was just running away with myself there! You don't need a history lesson, you can listen to News At Ten for that, but God Bless to all those who had to endure Hitlers Blitz.

I know I have said before that I will never buy flat pack furniture again. Unfortunately I had a moment of weakness, as my wife suggested we purchase a laptop table and a chest of drawers for our son, Cameron. As soon as I picked the offending items up from the shop though I knew we had trouble. The laptop table wasn't too bad but the chest of drawers (small) was a different story. Altogether were a mind blowing 141 pieces - you can just imagine the instruction booklet!.
In the end it took me a toe curling 125 minutes to finish constructing the beast. I have to say it does look good, but having used seven different screwdrivers, a battery powered drill that was about as much use as a chocolate tea pot, and sweating as much as Wayne Rooney at a family barbecue, I have to say that flat packs are just plain evil. I really think that the people who design these things do it with pure malice in their minds.

Isn't it always the case, Wayne Rooney had to score tonight didn't he. That's twice he has....NO STOP IT.

CH

Monday 6 September 2010

Business

Well, is Wayne Rooney a cheating, lying, philandering, adulterer. I don't know the answer to that question and to be honest I'm not really bothered. What does bother me though is the weak and cowardly responses from the same type of 'family' companies that stood by Tiger Woods during his 'couple of slip ups. You know the stuff, the 'no comment', the 'we stand by him during these 'allegations' sort of angle. Will someone ever show some ******** and tell it how it is. Or shall we just sweep it under the carpet and keep churning out the merchandise to the masses. Lets keep the kids coming through the door to buy the boots and shirts. Yes lets do that. If England had lost recently and Rooney had played badly there is no way Capello would have had in on that plane to wherever it is there going (OK so I'm not up with the fixture list at the moment) But no, the PR machine cannot be interrupted, nor can the 'bigger' picture. The argument with me is not about who did what - I'm not preaching here and I'm certainly no angel, if he or anyone else wants to cavort with a donkey whilst wearing a maids costume and hopping on one leg, then off you go - but what does annoy me is the way the money machine tries to pacify the situation. You can get injunctions or super injunctions or even Spaghetti Junctions but the truth will always come out, because as we all know your business is usually someone else's business too. The double standards are just a joke. And breath Mr Hargreaves.
I know it's probably the most unrealistic comparison of all time but dear old Mike Basset had it about right, and that's what we are missing here, a bit of realism - although seeing Fabio Capello dancing the night away with his star striker may be taking it a bit too far!

In other news (I like saying that) Burt and Bill have been separated for their own health (dwarf hamsters love a scrap!) Hattie has just told me that she painted the whole of Sidmouth and planted all the trees there, and I thank the lord. I just thank the lord, full stop.


CH

Sunday 5 September 2010

Skate park anyone!

Breaking news. Grandad Iain is crocked. Was it a DIY induced injury or a gardening graze ? No, Grandad Iain, an experienced and intelligent man, did in fact fall off Cameron's skateboard!. The result was a broken wrist, four hours in A and E and a plaster cast. One wrong move and he was on the floor with the skateboard flying through the air.
Chin up Iain I will get you some elbow and knee pads for Christmas!

In other news Mrs Millers birthday was celebrated this weekend. A great night was had by all at Mama Stones with lots of weird drinks, banter, and moves.

Crazy to think that only a couple of blogs ago I stated that footballers were actually out of the headlines for once. Whoops!

Night all.

CH

Thursday 2 September 2010

Beard

The beard has remained (a bit itchy though), two of the three children are back to school (tantrum free), I have just eaten a cheese sandwich (wreckless), and Fabio Capello is still annoying me (it's his face).

CH

Wednesday 1 September 2010

Jesus

After typing around five thousand words, and creating dozens of mind boggling diagrams for my A licence theory paper tonight, I am now 'computer phobic'. I also have RSS from my gardening project. When I shut my eyes tonight I will either see a stick man full back overlapping or miles and miles of bind weed.
Well in the world of sport we certainly do have some controversy. What with Pakistan's cricketers bowling like Auntie Beryl, and Harlequins rugby chaps back in the dock about the 'blood gate' scandal, football is actually out of the spotlight for once. Add to these 'small' misdemeanors Kevin Peterson's 'Tweet' rant and football really can consider itself squeaky clean. Well apart form the odd super car write off and illicit affair that is.
On the home front Grandma Joan is still creating last suppers and Grandad Iain has taken over as temporary entertainments manager. The children are back to school this week so we are bracing ourselves for tears and tantrums (and that's just us parents), and finally, I intend to shave my beard off tomorrow as I look like Jesus.
Amen

CH