Wednesday, 30 September 2009


Without going over the top, I think it was fair to say that we may have been 'robbed' last night. How the linesman did not see that the ball was over the line was beyond me, the penalty shout was at best madness, and the sending off just rounded off a bizarre night. I thought we showed great fight and character, all that effort for just one point though is a bit harsh, but another home game on Saturday gives us another chance to get some more points on the board. We have played well in most of our games but unless you stick the ball in the back of the onion bag you will not win games. We need score and see teams off when we are on top. That's the serious stuff done. What was fantastic for the lads last night was the support, constant and positive in hard circumstances, so thanks for that to those who came down.
Today will mostly be spent in ice.


Monday, 28 September 2009

Fire Chief

X-Factor here we come! Harriet (formerly known as Beast) is ready to take on Simon Cowell and co. After the game on Saturday the children's Grandparents (Avy and Mart) gave me some money to give to the children, and boy they couldn't wait to spend it. Cam got the obligatory PSP game, Issy got a lava lamp, and the obligatory DS game, and Hatty spotted an all singing all dancing keyboard with mic ensemble.
Already we have had a hundred or so renditions of Hatty's favourite songs, combine this with the fact that every time X-Factor comes on she bursts through the door and shouts "Here's Hatty Hargreaves", I think we have a budding singer in our midst!.

Tomorrow we have a huge game, not a must win, but more of a want to win and expect to win game. We are all well aware of the league position, a position that may be harsh but one that has to, and will, change.

Finally there has been a purchase made by one of the lads that could cause him a few problems. My mate Chris Todd has bought a 'new motor', a good runner, FSH, Alloys, etc etc. Unfortunately the fact that he looks like the local fire chief in it means that people could well be flagging him down for help at any point. Only joking mate, I can't wait to go in it tomorrow, and don't worry I'll bring the siren !!.


Sunday, 27 September 2009


Well what about my prediction about Sol Campbell finding league two harder than he might think ? Even I am surprised that he only lasted one game, and that was a loss! I read today that he felt let down by the shallow promises made by the club to get more high profile players in. Sol, if you honestly think that the club were about to sign players like Benjani then you must be mad. Notts County will be there or thereabouts come the end of the season, regardless of last weeks events, but one word springs to mind about the whole affair, shambles!.
I, along with Lee Hodges, went to the Plymouth v Forest game today. A catch up with old friends on both teams, a spot of radio and a half time round of applause went down well after a tough weekend. A full house at Argyle wasn't enough to drag the team to victory and so Plymouth are now another Devon side who have lost too many games on the spin. The most annoying thing about the whole day though was not being able to tell people how well we were doing, having had that luxury for two seasons. Answering the tenth question of "Whats happening down at your place" was hard to bare. At least I could sympathise with how they were felling though!!.

I am proud to be a Torquay player and like all Torquay supporters want the club to progress, I know we can carry on and do well this season but that all important victory cannot come quick enough for me. That is football done for today, tonight it's time to catch up with my wife on matters relating to children, money, schools, and obviously, most importantly, what's on TV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.


Saturday, 26 September 2009

You are fed up of hearing it and I'm fed up of saying it, we lost another football match when we were clearly in control. I'm gutted and tired and I, like everyone else returning on that coach, is hurting like hell, and if there not they should be. Tuesday is now a massive game, so unless someone else can come in and do a better job on the pitch then it's down to the players at the club at the moment to dig in and come up with a victory.
Thanks for travelling to watch us and thanks for clapping at the end.


Thursday, 24 September 2009

Bed Bound

A great night was had by all!(q and a at the club) I think that was the general consensus of opinion about last nights proceedings. It certainly was as far as us players were concerned. The meal was really good and so were the questions asked. The answers however did vary, especially from the grim reaper, Kev Nicholson - he was actually just pleased to be there and Jenny was also delighted to have a night off from Mr Motivator!!!.
Thank you to everybody who turned up and thanks for being 'sympathetic' with the questions.

I nipped to get cam a new pair of boots today (and trainers) as they seemed to have vanished into thin air. Well just one boot actually went missing so good luck to whoever is hopping about with one football boot on. The trainers apparently stayed with the single boot for company but what amazes me more is how Cam managed to return home from footy with nothing on his feet. Boys eh!.
I did reassure him that I too have lost the odd item over the years though but usually not my own - I buried my brothers new ball on Fistral beach after one minute of him having it and also rode his new bike off to a mates on Christmas day only to return without it!!!. I haven't improved with age, my current bank card is issue number eight!!
Finally I had a call today, I think they call it 'cold calling' where the caller in question picks random phone numbers and hopes he gets a sale on whatever product it may be. Well this is how the call went "Hello do you have trouble getting out of the bath" ?
....."Pardon"...."Do you find it hard getting out of the bath". After the initial shock I answered, laughing, "Give me a break mate I am only 37", the reply was a rapid "Oh OK bye".
So basically they were hoping I was nearly bed bound and be relieved of an aid to help lift me out of the bath. Sorry to disappoint you but no, I am not yet at that stage. Give me a call after another fifty games!!!!!!.


Wednesday, 23 September 2009


Tonight, together with Tim Sills, Chris Todd, and Kevin Nicholson, I will be attending a dinner (and Q and A session) at the football club held by the Trust. I am already looking forward to the first question.... "Why aren't you winning". I will pass that question onto Kev though!
It is actually a chance for everyone to chat about last season and also to raise money for the trust and 'Toddy's' charity. The mood we are in at the moment though is more of a 'last season has gone' sort of feeling, still it may stir up some passion as did the last Q and A evening a week before Wembley.
Today, and in the last few weeks and I'm sure in the next few weeks, my wife and I have been deliberating over a huge decision. It isn't what colour we should paint the living room or which card we should transfer over to, it isn't even what ridiculously expensive bag I will have to buy my wife for Christmas. No, the decision to be made is what secondary school our son is going to go to. I'm sure we are not the only ones in the country with this dilemma though and actually the bigger decision will probably be about the bag! I am of course joking.
The standard of facilities at all schools is unbelievable - not like in our day I hear some of you saying, when the nearest you got to a laptop was a calculator from WH Smiths, or when a mild telling off from a teacher was you being used as target practice for their blackboard rubber, and don't even get me going on the school dinners.....a pasta bar !! where has the double chips and beans and the chocolate crunch with pink custard (all for 40p) gone?.
It has all gone with the 'arc' thanks goodness (apart from the chocolate crunch), and the one person who should always have the final say is the person who is going to the school. So Cam will make his own final decision (and then we will make sure he has chosen the right one once he has gone to bed!!!!).


Tuesday, 22 September 2009


I know, this is getting ridiculous, but I have just sat down after a mammoth shift of garden sorting, garage clearing, football training and long multiplication homework!. Guess which one was the toughest!.

Things are positive at the club, a sharp session on the pitch today has put us in good stead for the weekend. At home now and my wife looks as if she has either had ten rounds with Mike Tyson or loves chewing tobacco. A routine filling (and the horse needle used) has caused her cheek to swell to Hamster like proportions. I have told her that I will obviously have to leave her if the swelling remains but for her not to think of me as shallow!!!.
And finally the piece of equipment that is vital for any self respecting (blogging, eBaying and facebooking)family is poorly. In technical terms the poor thing has a 'viral worm', in other words some weasly company want me to pay them to sort it out, otherwise they will keep on filling the screen with a load of rubbish and block any internet access. Still there are benefits to this dilemma, my wife cannot spend any money!!.


Monday, 21 September 2009


Extremeley late blog tonight, apologies for that, due to two important pieces of writing. An article on football for the paper was one and the other was a draft for a mate's (and the bridegrooms) speech. I could have gone on for hours to be honest, but for the health of HE readers, and for the sanity of the guests at the wedding, both had to be curtailed. Time flies when you are typing away though, it is also a rarity to get on the laptop at the moment as my wife has dominated it for the last three days, at one point I thought I saw her sat on it incubating an egg. The excitement of getting a new iphone, some ebay remnants, and the constant battle with job hunting does give her a valid excuse though.
My new topic for a rant is Homebase, overpriced, under stocked, and under staffed (although the girl that eventually served me was lovely). I could have ran down the ailse naked, whilst barking like a dog and hopping on one leg without being noticed. And you just try asking anybody for help (B&Q your in this too), they will avoid you like you have a vicious strain of leprosy and love hugging. Rant over, love to all, I'm off to bed.


Sunday, 20 September 2009


Woke up, coached football, went to the beach, built sandcastles, threw a Frisbee, ate dinner.... watching TV, going to bed. All accompanied with a still ridiculous slice of melancholy.


Saturday, 19 September 2009

No hiding places

This was written at 6.30 p.m last night, I didn't post it because I wasn't sure I would feel differently this morning - the answer is no, I feel worse.

I'm sure there will be a lot of frustrated and annoyed fans reading this blog, five losses on the spin is hard to believe after the last two years that we have enjoyed. As captain I feel responsible for the teams and my own performance, win, lose or draw. A freak own goal and a poorly defended free kick just sums us up at the moment though. You have to make your own luck in this game otherwise you get trampled on and left behind. We all have to remember what got us our success, hard work, team spirit and ability. I know which ones we haven't got at the moment and maybe that is what we will work on in the week.
Whether I carry on playing or not, am picked or not, or just remain at the club to coach, I desperately want us to do well. If we stick together and fight, no back biting or pointing fingers, results will come.
It's hard to explain how you feel after losses but it's not good, if ever there was a job in which your work comes home with you then this it is ours. The one thing you can never do though, whether you like it or not, is hide.
That is why I am writing this now.
One thing we still need is your support, whether you think the team or the captain or in fact anybody is at fault then fair enough, but what is needed more than anything is togetherness on and off the pitch.


Friday, 18 September 2009


Just got back after a great evenings entertainment. Was it the cinema or a meal out ? No, the whole family have been to the speedway in Somerset!. We were invited there by Mike Spearpoint, speedway supremo and general top bloke. The children loved it and so did we. I will give you a rundown tomorrow but for now I have a date with Johnny Ross and a big bag of minstrels.


Thursday, 17 September 2009


Last night was pure bliss, the beach was deserted, the sausages were cooking and the children were running in and out of the surf. The fact that a kid's club appeared out of nowhere and surrounded us with their cult like formation did hamper proceedings slightly, but after the 'death stare' and a slow and quiet "Go...Away", when one of the 'gang' decided to use our windbreak as a den, things did improve! (don't panic, I'm not evil, the young lad did laugh!)

He is in hiding at the moment, due to a bout of 'giant' flu, but Scott Bevan has turned 30. The big man is a bit low at the moment but I'm sure a rested achilles, a new tub of protein, and maybe even a date would really cheer him up. Happy Birthday big fella.
Tomorrow we will train in preparation to play, and hopefully beat, Grimsby. I will speak more about that later, in fact, maybe tomorrow, but for now it is time to sleep.


Wednesday, 16 September 2009

Hill Climb

Seventeen hill runs, a mountainous cross country race and a swim in a freezing, swirling sea. Yesterday's training, in a nutshell, was hard!
Hard, but sometimes mornings like that are needed. Not only was it a physical test, with Odacombe and Babbacoombe hills being 1 in 18 gradients!, it was also a mental one. We have been on a bad run of defeats, training had been hard the previous day and the mood in the camp was tense, but after a very hard day, with everyone giving it their all and after a quick dip in the sea, the atmosphere had definitely lightened - especially when witnessing the effects the cold water had on some of the boy's!!!!!.
Tyronne has not been seen since and the TV camera's even came in to film Danny Stevens, thanks again to 'Seaside Rescue'!.
It warmed my heart yesterday to see so many classic 'Devonshire' sights, the sun setting over Dartmoor, the waves crashing to the shore, my book in Waterstones, and even a burnt out speed camera. Yes Ok the last two were 'red herrings' but all the same I did have to laugh when I heard Lee 'Lambster' Mansell's message on my phone...."Jesus is there anywhere I can go to get away from you, me and Alyssa ( his daughter) were just walking through town when she shouted 'look it's Hatty's daddy', I looked up and there you were in the window". Other words were used as well but we don't need them do we !!. Don't worry 'lamb'I will try not to get blinded by the lights and I will save you a poster for your wall!!!!!!. It is 'slightly' below Wembley but nevertheless it is a proud moment knowing the blog has reached Waterstones, now the hard part of keeping them out of the bargain basket begins!!!.
Today I aim to unravel the body and then take my 3 mobile back to the Disney Store where it belongs!


Monday, 14 September 2009

Monday Blues

There were a few Monday blues this morning, some strong words and some strong tackles followed before the morning session was done. Winning games has the effect of putting everybody in a good mood and likewise, losing matches has the effect of putting everybody in a bad mood. How you handle both is the difficult bit !!. We face my home town club of Grimsby on Saturday (well my home town is Cleethorpes actually where the ground is situated).
It would be good to make that the game when our run of bad results comes to an end. Enough of football now and my wife returned today after a weekend of relaxation. A three day hen weekend at Centre Parcs with no children including swimming, 'jacuzzing', 'saunaing', drinking and eating must have recharged the batteries - I obviously said that it killed me, what with all the chores to do, the children to look after and meals to cook. But thanks Grandma Joan, I owe you one!!!!!.

This week I aim to Kayak as far out to sea as possible, visit the local motorbike garage for a window shop, beat Dan at tennis, and include a song title in every blog I do. Some might say that's pushing it but if I'm a lucky man it should all come together nicely.


Sunday, 13 September 2009


Not one of my favourite weekends so far! It started badly, finding myself warming the bench for the game was the first problem. That was soon followed up by a shocking decision by the referee - a classic bit of play by a striker saw me being robbed of the ball, the man in black was mugged and the goal was given.
I then missed a great headed chance before scoring in the final minutes. My family were at the game and so I really wanted to give them a nice (winning) day, but football is not like that is is !. It didn't matter though, the fact that they were there was just great.
It was Hannah's 16th birthday so Paul, Auntie Mo, three of Hannah's friends, and my parents had decided to come over to the match. I hope you enjoyed some of it guy's!, and Hannah, feel free to wear the T.U.F.C scarf and jacket to as many concerts, shopping trips or sleepovers (I bet you three got no sleep at all in that tent) as you like!!!!!. By the way, the lad's thought you were all lovely but I soon put a stop to that!!!!!.

Today, Cam hurt his ankle at Football, Hatty threw a wobbler at Tim's party, and I was unapproachable due to a bad mood of epic proportions.
I will blog with a more philosophical viewpoint tomorrow, but for now, thanks so much to all those who trekked to see us play yesterday, and goodbye.

P.S Paul, you really are rock of a man, hope to see you at another game soon.


Thursday, 10 September 2009

Next one!

A busy week is nearly at an end - there's just the small matter of training tomorrow, travelling eight hours, and then beating Rochdale of course!. As I reported in the previous blog there has been a distinct lack of words recently. On Tuesday night I bolted upright in bed (no not what your thinking!) and realised that I hadn't blogged, it was too late to go downstairs though and my body had also reached the 'poleaxed' stage!.
Last night however I had a valid excuse, I was wet, it was late, and I was still swaying from side to side. No, I hadn't been to the pub to watch the England game (I did see some of the second half but anyway back to the story), I had been out at sea!!!!!!.
A mate of mine (another Chris) mentioned a while a go that I should pop over for a sail sometime - I agreed, saying that I couldn't wait (whilst actually thinking that I would fall in!). Then the text came through SEE YOU AT 6, THE RACE STARTS AT 6.30!!. I fumbled with the phone to send the words back RACE, WHAT RACE?. The reply was something along the lines of 'It's nothing just get there for 6'. I did and before long I was being rowed to a big boat with big sails and a lot of rope!!!. Once on board (and after handshakes with the crew, who had the combined sailing experience of about 200 years!) I soon learned that my job would be to keep out of the way, watch the boom, and be ready to jump from side to side - I was more than happy with this task after being given a five minute crash course by Chris which involved numerous words I had never heard of!!.
If I said Boom, beam, cleat, coffee grinder, furl, haylard, Jib, spinnaker, trim, tiller, or even port to you, you would probably be as out of your depth (no pun intended) as I was. And that was before the race had even started!. When the siren went off it was manic, everyone had a job (except me), some had two or three roles. Whether it be steering (helm or skipper) the boat or winding one of the three hundred ropes on board it was all hands on deck. Don't even get me started on turning round, all you need to know is that if someone shouts "STARBOARD", it is going to be a close shave, and there were many!. I got very wet, didn't stand up for two hours ( apart from being asked to lean against the boom every so often, which though I was told could see me thrown into the sea and to be careful!!!), and was only saved from being entirely useless by the fact that I could be used as ballast!!. It was brilliant though, the weather was fantastic and the sailing experience was a real eye opener (It's not as easy as it looks!). Thanks to Chris and all the boy's for inviting me. Let's just say that the term 'Fathom' was used but in a different context and that the word 'overboard' wasn't used, and that was good enough for me.



I am posting this short notice as an apology



Monday, 7 September 2009

Big Day

Hatty's big day was finally upon us, today was her first day at school (pre-school), and she couldn't have been more excited. Up early with the older two Hatty was straight on with the uniform, had her pack up in hand and was waiting for us all at the front door. It was a great sight seeing them toddle off together, although the bit where you leave them (well Harriet) at school was a bit of a struggle - not for her, she was straight in on the action, but for us (well me!). My little girl looked too young to be 'abandoned' by the playdo - and to be honest she will be the youngest in her year - but it was too late to turn back and Hatty was more than ready to hold her own with her new friends!!.
We needn't have worried anyway. As we picked her up she sighed happily and said "I've had such a lovely day at school". And the best bit about it all? while I type away my little firecracker isn't hung around my neck asking to go to the park or to the beach, she is too shattered!!.

BIG 30

Wayne had a 'bit of a do' last night to celebrate his 30th birthday. 'Little Em' had Wayne had organised a bash for friends and family. The Irish massive were over in the form of his Mum and Dad (Linda and Albert) and his sister Nikki and boyfreind Jonny. Big thanks for some great banter about old 'Wayno', some great pictures of a young Carlisle, and of course for flying the blog flag in Ireland (I know!, I was shocked as well!) - must also give a big mention to Sarah, otherwise I'll be in big trouble at the next 'do' (wedding maybe!!). Entertainment came in the form of Fletch and his band 'Shrine'. He is a big boy with a big voice, and an even tighter leather jacket and jeans combo than I had on!!!. It was a good laugh catching up with Fletch though, the last time I had seen him was on the team coach after Wembley, as you can imagine, a really quiet affair!!.
Then the moment everbody had been waiting for, the 'interval' entertainment started.
Yes, up steps Martin 'Gallagher' Rice, complete with shades, lager, and 'Liam stance'. He fired off a quick back catalogue!, even bringing his mate in on the action. His mate lent back that far that he couldn't reach the mike and when he eventually did he sang with the mike in his eye!!!. Brilliant stuff though, well played Fletch, Mart, and Mart's mate!!.
All bookings to be made through their new agent, Chris Hargreaves!.
A few pints of the black stuff, more butchering of songs (Wroe/Carlisle/Mansell), lot's of good food and the night was done.

Today we had a fitness day, cutting edge stuff that the team really enjoyed, those who could train anyway. I am in for a week of ice, fancy machines, and Pete Morgan's epic stories.

And finally, last but by no means least, gargantuan congratulations to my wife Fiona, who yesterday completed the Powderham Castle 10k run. In aid of Cancer research, and with 1000 entries, it was a great day. And a great achievement for a very nervous Mrs H.
It was a breeze for 'Fioan Radcliffe' in the end though, in fact she was that focused on the finish (including the power ballad blasting into her ears) that she completely blanked the lunatic waving his arms by the side of the track, thanks for that!!!


Big Day


News report on Wayne Carlisle's 30th to follow!


Saturday, 5 September 2009

Bandage and Stretcher

I don't know what to say about today, other then the sooner it ends the better!. I should have known it was going to be one of those day's when my wife phoned saying that she was going to be late - thus resulting in a train journey there rammed with Muse fans, and a train journey back full of Bournemouth fans, winner eh!!.
The game started well, then I tried to get on to a pass sent to me with a bandage and stretcher. The next 35 minutes was spent trying to run it off but to no avail, I couldn't actually bend my knee by the end of the first half, game over for me.
Again, we conceded late on and so lost the game. Again we were the better team, so this now has to stop. More work is needed starting on Monday.
I am the world's worst at taking defeats and having injuries so I will sign off now and wish you all a great Saturday night. If only it could be as simple as it is in Hatty's world, she just wants hugs, food and fun. Long may that continue!.


Friday, 4 September 2009

Simple Stuff

It's simple stuff tonight, tomorrow we play football and, as usual, we want to win. My family also return tomorrow so hopefully there will be a double celebration by the time Simon Cowell has pressed his buzzer.
Many happy returns today to Mustapha Carayoul (21 going on 41) and Lee Hodges (36 going on 56 and now the oldest player ish!!! at the club). A shocking 'credit crunch' showing on the cake front - in that there weren't any!.
Belated MHR to Elliot Benyon as well, his presents included a water pistol, a catapult, some gobstoppers and a chemistry set!.


Thursday, 3 September 2009

Mercy Mission

With my families absence eventually breaking me I decided that a mercy mission was needed. So after training yesterday it was a case of Planes, Trains and Automobiles to St Ives. Being car less at the moment I jumped in with the Plymouth crew (depleted by the Ghoul being on loan and subdued by Ben Joyce' refusal to talk!) and took a train from Plymouth to Truro. A nice relaxing journey (I could easily bore you to death with facts about IKB's bridge, maybe another time!) there was soon a distant memory as my wife and a sleeping Hatty arrived in a screaming, clutch deprived, car! - it must be those Cornish hill starts!.
An hour and a half later, a few phone calls, a detour to a friend of a friends garage, and, after a limp home, we had arrived at the cottage. Then followed a hugging session, a round of darts and a catch up.
We then walked down to the harbour for a British classic, fish and chips on the seafront (well restaurant!). I had forgotten how nice St Ives was, after all, it is twenty five years since my parents piled us into the car and headed South. Funnily enough I do still remember the ten hour trip, eye spy marathon and buried football mystery ( my brother's ball, I buried it, we couldn't find it, I was in trouble!).
I'm sure I speak for a lot of grandparents out there in saying that the time they have to spend with their grandchildren is very treasured. It seems that it is a case of making up for lost time, having probably not had as much time to spend with their own children as they would have liked. I our children will have been spoilt rotten this week so it will feel like cold comfort farm when they return home and have to go to school!.
After the fish and chip supper, a drop of red and the obligatory ice cream (thanks again Iain!) we walked the 1000 calories back to base.
More hugs and kisses (children of course) and it was soon alarm setting time. Another car and train journey to Plymouth and I was back in with the PLY crew. It was then that the unthinkable happened, Ben Joyce spoke!!.
Not in a 'went out last night, it was decent' sort of way though. No, the Joyce was full on.... "Moved into a new house last night, I was carrying a duvet and while I was walking up the steps I tripped and whacked my head (he has a big mark on his head) on the wall. I was knocked out for about 2 minutes, my girlfriend was shouting at me to wake up. It's a nice house though and my girlfriend is going to get a job so it will be good".
And then silence!!!. I laughed and said to Hodgy, who was driving, "Wow I can't believe that mate can you", Hodgy replied with "I know he didn't even speak to me when I picked him up". Great stuff from the second most bizarre car school in Devon - after all, an Irishman, a Welshman, an Englishman and Martin 'Gallagher' Rice takes some beating for first!!!!!.


Wednesday, 2 September 2009

Bear hug

A great performance saw the lads to victory last night, good passing in the first half and good battling in the second took us through. A delayed coach (not booked!) and a five minute bear hug from Martin Allen just added to these ever so bizarre away trips!!!!.


Tuesday, 1 September 2009

Evening all

Sorry about the lack of blog last night, in the absence of my little clan I don't seem to be functioning properly. In fact, as well as forgetting to post a blog, I have also done such random things as clearing the garage, mowing the lawn, organising the loft and relaxing! - and I have to tell you that I don't like it!.
Tonight we travel to Cheltenham, with it a chance to catch up with one of my old managers Martin Allen, and a chance to progress in a cup competition. This season has been a bit up and down already but we are close to finding the right combination. All football clubs have peaks and troughs, on and off the pitch, it's simple really, as long as we all stick together and want the same thing we will do well.
Only a small rant today, I was riding my mountain bike on Sunday (random again!) and had to go up onto the path as it was a really busy road with no cycle path. As I rode along the deserted path, bizarrely, a woman 'traffic officer' stood on a corner (obviously in a bad mood after investigating a mole theft) shouted "Your on the wrong side and get on the road". (There was no path on the other side !!!!!).
So my scenario was simple, be a good boy and ride across the road, get crushed by a lorry or car speeding down the tight road, but be legal!!. I chose my own option and shouted back "If it's Ok with you I would rather keep my life intact today, so either run after me, phone a helicopter, or chill out". The last comment may have been pushing it, I half expected a police chopper to appear in the sky or a road block to be facing me, but I made it home (at pace!).
Some conclusions to be drawn from this are; don't approach policewomen on a Sunday, don't choose a road with no cycle path (hard to do) and under no circumstances take your bike out of the garage!.

P.S Before any letters of complaints go into the HE, I like the police, I like cycles, be green, and mole's do not steal!.