Wednesday 14 October 2009

Par 9 !

Tuesday is rapidly becoming a non blog day, too many after school clubs and not enough time, so apologies about that. I am finding it quite hard to concentrate whilst I am typing away as Hatty is 'jammin'. Her piano and mic ensemble has been taking a real battering lately. Favourite lyrics include "I don't care, I don't care" and "She had fun and she played with she's toys"! All carried out with the most mental of facial expressions.
If anyone reading this happens to have a laser levelling business (unlikely I know) then please have pity on us and pop down to our training ground. Arnold Palmer, Tiger Woods, Greg Norman, 'Monty' or 'Seve', I defy any of you to be able to read the greens on offer at the racecourse. Not only is it like playing on a car park (No rain at the moment, hence rock hard), it also has more bumps in it than Mr Bumps back garden ( I know that is a bizarre analogy but I couldn't think of anything really bumpy and I bet Mr Bumps garden is bumpy!). This results in the ball bobbling around like it's got a weight in it. Not only that, your body thinks that it is actually running on flat ground, when really there is a four or five inch gradient every couple of yards. This results in groin, hamstring, and back trauma of the highest order. Roll on the rain and roll on a roller!!!!.
To be honest though it is good to have any permanent training ground at all. At a lot of clubs that I have played for, big and small, there has been many a day spent driving around trying to find a suitable pitch to train on. At Grimsby we all used to pile into the minibus, the manager and assistant, the players and the balls and our huge portable goals all crammed in together. We would then head off to a destination unknown, sometimes a favour from a local club would see us through. Failing that we would roll up at one of the local parks and set up. It was great for the team spirit, but not all things back then would be recommended now. Tea at half time, your own warm up (optional), and a nip of whisky (optional) before the game all seem a bit 'old school' now, unless your a supporter, in which case all of the above are recommended!.
The game has certainly moved on since then though, players are very fit, they take various supplements, lift weights, exercise their 'core' and stay in more! and most managers now demand as much technology as is possible, from urine analysis to heart rate monitors, from pro-zone 'stats' to BMI tests, it is really a case of getting as much out of your team and players as is possible.
In reality though if a player is in the 'zone' and confident he could have ten pints and a curry the night before a game, he could drink tea and whisky beforehand and he could walk out onto the pitch at 2.59 p.m and still play well ( It has been done )- his career however would last as long as the 'Postman Pat' ride outside our local Tesco's!.

CH

P.S Big up to Howard, a Torquay fan currently serving out in Afghanistan, thanks for the letter and keep an eye out for the post. A yellow shirt will soon be arriving with lots of squiggles on it!!!.

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